Saturday, October 18, 2014

The End

I ended it.  Actually, it's been almost ten months since I ended it.  I didn't wait to write a final blog post until now because I was angry, hurt, grieving, or any of those negative things.  I waited to write a final blog post because I simply forgot.  I'm happier than ever, and I say that very honestly.  So why, after almost two years, did I dump him? For many, many reasons.  I had to get out before we hit the two-year mark, or I would've felt obligated to stay.  I know that I'll leave out a billion vital reasons that I had to get out of the relationship, but this is an attempt to document them.

1) Immaturity
It took him seven years to finish college, which is just unacceptable. And it's not like he went to an academically rigorous college anyway. He has no ambition and no pride in his work.  Many of his friends are older than he is but act like they're in high school, which rubs off on him, of course. He embarrassed me many times with his childish social awkwardness in front of my friends, as well as in public.

2) Insecurity
He was so insecure that he constantly needed validation about his behavior, his body, his receding hairline, his mannerisms, his interactions with people, and everything else.  He took out his insecurities on me and liked to refer to me as his slave, which was just freaking weird.  I told him many times to stop, and he always got offended that I didn't laugh.  He said it was obviously a joke.  Nope.  It was just freaking bizarre.  He was also insanely jealous and needy.

3) Religion
I shouldn't have ever dated him because I knew from the beginning that religion was important to me, but it wasn't important to him.  I tried many times to get him to come to church with me.  I finally gave him an ultimatum to give religion a chance or to get out of my life.  He was desperate to stay with me even though I already knew it was over, so he came to church with me one time.  He acted like a fidgety five-year-old during the service.  I broke up with him that very day.

His odd behavior after the breakup only solidified my certainty that dumping him was the right thing to do.  He continued to reach out to me with desperate pleas to get back together and with promises of all the ways he would change.  He begged.  He cried.  He became a serial dater.  He slept with someone on the second date and felt the need to confess this incident, as well as other dating conquests, to me.  Maybe he thought it would make me jealous.  It didn't.  It just reaffirmed my negative perception of him.

So the main reason I ended it?  I made too many concessions from the very first day.  I knew early on that something didn't feel quite right, but I stuck with it because sometimes things were great.  I should've been more focused on the long-term.  Overall, it was a great learning experience for me.  I just hope he grows up one day.  If he doesn't, Lord help the next girl.  One thing is for certain, however.  I will not be the next girl.

Wednesday, October 31, 2012

The Little Things

I figured I'd start an ongoing post of the little things that See Ya does to make me smile.  There are a lot, so I hope I remember to update this post as they happen!

10/28: We were driving out of town to visit his grandmother.  He was driving separately so that he could go back to school directly from her house, and his car was right in front of mine.  On the side of the road, we passed a dead cat that had been hit by a car.  He knows how much seeing things like that upsets me.  Not even five seconds after I saw the cat, my phone was ringing.  He called me to ask me if I was okay and talked to me for a minute to make me feel better.  So sweet.

11/9: He called me at 5:21 AM.  Did I want to kill him?  Yes.  But he sang his official wake-up song for me, which goes, "Time to get up, time to get up, boodoodoodoo!"  I had to laugh.  Thank goodness I could sleep in as long as I wanted after we said goodbye.

11/11: He texted me when he was out at a club with a lot of his single friends: "I'm glad I'm not single."  Amazing how something so simple can mean so much.  And I feel the same way.

11/15: He called me at 6:57 AM, minutes before my alarm woke me up.  What did he do?  He sang The Lonely Island's "Dick in a Box" to me.  It was amazing to laugh myself awake.

11/17: He is coming down with a cold, so I got him some medicine. When I asked him how he felt, he said, "Good, because I'm here with you."  Too. Freaking. Sweet.

Sunday, October 21, 2012

Nine Months: Arf Arf

Best nine months ever.  We're so comfortable around each other and so compatible that we now communicate by barking like seals. I know it sounds weird, but it works.  We work.  The thing is, I could go on forever about how wonderful he is and how great things are, but I know that happy, successful relationship stories are not nearly as interesting to read as are funny, epic fail dating stories.  And guess what?  I'm fine with that.  More than fine.

Sunday, October 7, 2012

One Wonderful Weekend

This weekend was perfect.  We've had so many fantastic weekends together, but this one was my favorite so far!  I drove up to visit him on Thursday night and was excited about getting to spend three nights there rather than just two!  When I arrived, we grabbed dinner at Mellow Mushroom.  Maui Wowie is our favorite pizza, and we had a pitcher of Blue Moon.  After that, we walked around a little bit and decided to put on our bathing suits and get in the hot tub.  Funny story, I bought one of my favorite bikinis in Boone last February when I was visiting him for the first time and we had hot tub access.  This is the bikini I always take with me now when I visit him.  Next, we went to Marble Slab for ice cream.  Coffee ice cream with Heath bar pieces.  So good.  And finally, we ended up going back to his room and watching Cabin in the Woods.

The next morning, we went outlet shopping in Blowing Rock pretty much all day, grabbed an early dinner at Black Cat, and went back to his room for margaritas!  His roommates invited us to see Ted with them for a dollar in the student center, so that was fun!  We fell asleep pretty quickly afterwards.  On Saturday morning, we decided to go back to Blowing Rock and explore the downtown area.  They were having Art in the Park, which is an event where vendors showcase and sell their work.  It was awesome to see all the handmade jewelry, woodwork, and pottery.  We went to Best Cellar for lunch, and I ended up tipping the waitress five pennies because she was absolutely awful. I'm normally a generous tipper, but she was just terrible.  After walking around some more, we went to Bald Guy Brew and had coffee and caramel apple cider.  I also got a little bit of homework done there! Eventually, we headed back to his room and made spaghetti for dinner. Somehow, we then ended up back in Blowing Rock at Six Pence Pub, which is an awesome place.  I had Snakebite, which is a mixture of Newcastle and apple cider.  Delicious!  As soon as we stepped outside of the pub, the most wonderful chocolate aroma hit us. It was time for some homemade fudge.  At Kilwins, we got three slices of epic fudge: chocolate English walnut, chocolate peanut butter, and salted caramel with walnuts.  It was amazing.  To end the night, we went to visit some of his rugby friends at a small house party.

This morning, we had breakfast at home and then decided to go back to Blowing Rock for lunch.  It was extremely foggy and chilly outside, so we were thrilled when they seated us next to the fire at MK's Southern Cooking.  As a side note, my fried green tomato BLT was phenomenal.  And just to prove I'm not a terrible tipper or a terrible person, I tipped the waiter at MK's almost 20%.  Why?  Because he didn't suck.  I drove See Ya back to campus, and I hit the road.  I just don't know how this weekend could have been any better.  His fall break starts on Wednesday, so I can't wait to see him again in a few days!  Life is so good.

Tuesday, September 25, 2012

Eight Months: Life Is Good

Distance is annoying, but we still see each other every weekend, which is wonderful!  I definitely got spoiled by seeing him pretty much every day over the summer.  This month, he came home with me and met a good portion of my mom's side of the family.  Not surprisingly, they all love him, and he handled their craziness like a pro!  Basically, he fit in wonderfully, and we had a fabulous weekend in my hometown. The next weekend, he came with me to Duke's Homecoming.  Even though the dance was lame this year, which was extremely disappointing, we made our own fun and got margaritas at the Dillo. Also, he surprised me and bought me flowers beforehand, which was ridiculously sweet.  Ah, he makes me happy.

Monday, August 20, 2012

Seven Months: Best Summer Ever

So I'm jumping the gun a little bit considering our seven-month anniversary is tomorrow, but I don't think we're going to break up within the next couple of hours.  This has been the best summer of my life, and I have him to thank for that.  Excluding the five weeks he spent in summer school, we pretty much saw each other every single day.  We worked side-by-side as camp counselors, ate numerous meals together, explored the local culture, and spent hours watching United States of Tara, Luther, Sherlock, and Breaking Bad.  Before he drove back to school this morning, we had a fantastic breakfast together at one of our favorite restaurants.  I hated saying goodbye, even though I knew that I'll see him on many weekends and that we'll talk almost every day. This summer has just been so amazing, and I hate that it's over. However, it's wonderful to know that he and I will both be graduating in May.  And now to be totally cheesy and reference one of our favorite movies, 500 Days of Summer, I have one thing to say: I love us.

Saturday, July 21, 2012

Six Months: How Sweet It Is

How sweet it is to be loved by you.
How sweet it is to be loved by you.

I needed the shelter of someone's arms, and there you were.
I needed someone to understand my ups and downs, and there you were.
With sweet love and devotion,
Deeply touching my emotion.
I want to stop and thank you baby,
I want to stop and thank you baby.

How sweet it is to be loved by you.
How sweet it is to be loved by you.

I close my eyes at night,
Wondering where would I be without you in my life.
Everything I did was just a bore,
Everywhere I went it seems I'd been there before.
But you brighten up for me all of my days,
With a love so sweet in so many ways.
I want to stop and thank you baby,
I just want to stop and thank you baby.

How sweet it is to be loved by you.
How sweet it is to be loved by you.

You were better to me than I was to myself.
For me, there's you and there ain't nobody else.
I want to stop and thank you baby,
I just want to stop and thank you baby.

How sweet it is to be loved by you.
How sweet it is to be loved by you.
How sweet it is to be loved by you.
It's like jelly, baby.
How sweet it is to be loved by you.
Just like honey to the bee, babe.
How sweet it is to be loved by you.
How sweet it is to be loved by you.